Standard Deviation
by Xairathan
Summary: Rebuild-verse, post-3.33. NERV has presumably fallen, and now all that's left is to pick up the pieces. From the prompt "we started with one and now we have seven".


Kyu says it's not her fault, but really it is, at least in part. The only other person who could conceivably shoulder some blame for this is Asuka, who from the incredulous look on her face, has only just realized the extent to which her enabling has progressed.

"Kyu, please," she says from the stairway of the flight control tower. "We started with one, and now there's seven."

"I'm sorry," Kyu replies. Her tone is far too flippant for it to be an apology. One problem with letting Kyu stay almost exclusively with Asuka and Mari: she's picked up their biting sense of humor, even surpassed them in some areas.

"You're not sorry." Asuka climbs over the safety railing, dangles, drops neatly to the floor. A decade and a half of scrambling to the sound of constant alarms makes one very used to risky shortcuts. "So." Asuka walks over to Kyu and places an arm on her shoulder, leans on her. The other soldiers that Misato sent on the recovery mission trickle past them- and one new addition. "You figure out what to call her yet?"

"I think someone other than me should make that decision," Kyu says. It's not a matter of rank: just experience. Even Mari for all her whimsicality would be better at assigning someone a name than Kyu. "She was in the maintenance tunnels. Maybe you can make something of that."

"How old?"

"I'm not sure. I think her tube cracked during the attack on NERV. She must have retreated further into the facility to seek shelter."

"Two weeks, then."

It's such a short period of time, but so much has happened that two weeks might be another year to Asuka. They attacked NERV, halting an attempted Impact; since then there hasn't been any retaliation, hence the search parties: there are at least five people aboard the _Wunder_ that Asuka knows won't rest until Gendo Ikari's body is found.

So far, all they've found are miles of machinery, half-completed EVAs numbering in the hundreds, and the occasional Ayanami-type wandering the facility, looking utterly lost. Kyu's wondered, as she's sure Asuka has as well, whether the presence of another clone with those returning teams makes things better or worse. But so far all the clones they've encountered have come back to the _Wunder_ , and that's a victory in itself.

"Sakura's gonna kill us," Asuka muses. "She's running out of space to house them all."

"Couldn't we drop them off at one of the settlements?"

"Misato wouldn't allow it. She'll want to keep an eye on them all, like she did with you."

"Oh. Right."

The returning soldiers split up as they approach the hatchways, leaving the newest Ayanami-type standing atop the flight deck looking around in confusion. Kyu notes that she stares not downward into the ship as the others had, but up at the sky and clouds, as if it's the first time she's seen anything like this. More likely than not, it is.

"Go on." Asuka's elbow brushes the small of Kyu's back. "You're the only one who's talked to her so far. Tell her where to go."

"Why not you?"

"Because she needs to get used to seeing more of herself?" Asuka turns with a wave of her hand. "Just tell her to go find Sakura so we can go..." Asuka's hand continues through the air where her voice does not. "You've been gone for two days."

"You make that sound like much longer than it actually is."

"You get stuck in time like I do, all the days start running together. Makes the different ones stand out that much more. Go on."

Kyu nods and departs for the Ayanami-type. Asuka watches Kyu touch her shoulder, speaking quietly, gesturing at the hatches and in Sakura's general direction. The clone- and Asuka hesitates to call her that; she's seen how different they can all be- nods, though she does not move.

It occurs to Asuka that maybe this clone won't go so easily like the others: if this one's already discovered the intrigue of the world around her, she might not want to disappear into the mechanical innards of the _Wunder_ , might just stay under the open air until Misato sends someone to get her. Then the clone reaches out and grabs at Kyu's hand, tugging her towards the nearest hatch.

"Asuka?" Kyu turns back, gesturing to her double. "She wants me to take her. I'll be back as soon as I get her to Sakura."

"Go ahead," Asuka says. "I'll just wait here."

Both Ayanamis disappear beneath the flight deck, one leading the other down the metal staircase. Asuka steps back, hops up on one of the empty fuel barrels gathered near the hatches. The thing about persuading Misato to take in the other Ayanami-types is that it's caused a new batch of problems for Asuka. For one, there's the question of who would take care of them. Sakura's volunteered to bunk them in the infirmary, but it'll be Kyu's job to get them used to the world, and Asuka's to... she's not quite sure. Talk to them, of course, but that's hard to do when none of them will leave the infirmary and Asuka's duties keep her far from that place.

Then there's Kyu, who doesn't have anything to do, who can stay in the infirmary for as long as she wants since no one's quite learned how to tell the clones apart except Asuka, and to an extent, Sakura. Kyu, who only returns to Asuka's room at night, who gets whisked away whenever she's not busy helping another clone settle down to help the WILLE teams navigate the labyrinthine corridors at NERV. They don't talk nearly as often, and for Asuka it should signal a return to normalcy- to moving and breathing on a strict military schedule, ready at any time to be sortied- only there's no one to fight, and Asuka's become more reliant on Kyu than she'd like to admit.

There's that familiar sting, that pang she'd felt when she woke up and heard that both Shinji and Rei were gone, and during that first and only time she'd let a NERV drone get past her and land a hit on Mari. That feeling that's followed her all her life, the one of finding something, only to have to let it go. At first she'd thought she'd found someone like herself in Misato, in Mari; then Misato and Ritsuko tightened up as WILLE grew larger, and Mari retreated to the _Wunder_ 's engine room, doing heaven-knows-what for hours.

And now, here's Kyu: finding the 'others' she'd brought up occasionally in passing, ensuring that there will be more than one Ayanami that survived the fall of NERV, and that none of them would be named Rei.

It's their drifting apart that Asuka's always pondered in the dark hours of the morning, but not quite. She's always imagined it as quiet, dramatic. Today it's sunny and there are helicopters coming and going, kicking up a steady wind that lashes Asuka's hair in every direction; today the average has been set at a clone every other day, and Misato's scheduled more teams to go into the wreckage of NERV tomorrow. Asuka's never seen the cloning chamber that Kyu spoke of, but whenever she closes her eyes, she imagines lines of tubes, all cracked, their contents joining up and becoming something Asuka knows she'll never be a part of, simply because she's not one of them.

And to think that before she'd been worried that Kyu would never be accepted by anyone other than Asuka, Mari, and Sakura.

"Shikinami!"

Asuka's head snaps to the side, glaring in the direction of that sound. A crewman is motioning at her, pointing to a clipboard laden with checklists. "What is it?" Asuka shouts.

"Found something we need you to look at. Makinami's nowhere to be found, and you're here already, so..."

"Just make it quick."

With a roll of her eyes, Asuka follows the crewman over to a different portion of the deck, this one cordoned off and used for material storage. The crewman points at a rounded piece of what appears to be red crystal, though Asuka knows better at a glance.

"Core material," she says, leaning over and planting her foot on the smooth surface. She stares down into it, her reflection leering back at her. "You found this in NERV?"

"We found it a long ways away from the EVA production lines," says the crewman. "There was significant reason to believe it was active Core material-"

"It's been activated. Key word being 'been'." Asuka gives the core a contemptuous kick and tugs her hat down over her eyes. "I'd guess it was a prototype or an experimental one. Something for Ikari to run his tests on." _Like Kyu._

"Think it's safe to keep aboard?"

"Ask Misato what she wants to do with it. If she wants to build me another Unit-02, we might need it," Asuka scoffs. Like that'd ever happen with NERV neutralized.

"We'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Captain."

Asuka merely nods and stalks back over to the barrels, intent on reclaiming her seat. Kyu is already there when she rounds the corner of the flight control tower, turning in every which direction. "That was fast," Asuka says as she comes up behind her.

"Asuka?" There's a hint of surprise in Kyu's gaze, something that shouldn't be there.

"Yeah, it's me. No clones of me running around the place, I promise."

"I thought you had gone somewhere else."

"Just needed me to check on something." Asuka leans down, peering into Kyu's eyes. "Something happen on the mission? You seem jumpy."

"No, just- I mean, it is nothing. Did you want to do anything?"

"You do realize none of you are good at lying yet, right? Not even you, Kyu."

"I..." Kyu shakes her head, steps closer to Asuka. Her hands find their way around one of Asuka's arms, clinging to her, something Asuka hasn't seen Kyu do since their first weeks aboard the _Wunder_. It's one of the first nervous tics Asuka picked up on, one that remains exclusive to Kyu, since she's the only one who's always in close proximity to Asuka. "I've been busy."

"You have," Asuka agrees. She curls an arm against Kyu's back, slowly guiding them to sit on one of the empty barrels. Here's one thing she can take solace in, and that's Kyu's predictability. When she locks up like this, Asuka only has to wait for her to start relaxing. Once that's done, the rest will unravel.

"I have not been present around you lately." Asuka nods; that's true, but saying it won't do anything to help Kyu. She hums instead, resting her head against Kyu's, lazily tracking the progress of a helicopter departing into the blue horizon. "I thought maybe things had changed while I was gone."

"Like what?"

"Maybe you were tired of me. I thought you would want someone else who would be interesting. Who would be there for you."

"If I've managed to stay single for fourteen years, I don't think that's going to change just because we bombed the shit out of NERV."

"There are others," says Kyu, and immediately Asuka grasps what she's trying to say. There are others who are more impressionable, just as Kyu once was; Asuka would only have to speak to one, whereas Kyu would have to manage the others. It would be a quiet transition of Kyu fading into the background with the other clones and another one taking her place, and the only ones on the ship who would know would be Kyu and Asuka and maybe Sakura.

"You really think I'd ditch you like that?" asks Asuka. She feels Kyu shift in her arms and immediately says, "You don't have to answer that."

"It would not be in your nature," Kyu says. "But then again, I once thought that Ikari meant me no harm."

"That's not exactly the best analogy, you know. I'm not trying to end the world here." Asuka shifts and levels her gaze with Kyu's. "Besides, Commander Ikari saw you as expendable."

"And you?"

"You should know already." Asuka leans forward, touching their noses together. "How many times have I told you I love you?"

"I haven't kept track." Kyu's red eyes go wide, searching Asuka's face. "Was I supposed to?"

"Don't be silly," laughs Asuka. "I haven't been keeping track either."

"There's a clone like that. Likes counting everything. She's been helping Sakura with the inventory."

"We're not here to talk about them, Kyu. I'm here for you."

"I know." Kyu's hands relax their grip on Asuka's arm, allowing her to move closer. "I wish I could say the same."

"You're here with me, aren't you?" Asuka cracks a smile, one that spreads from ear to ear. "You're doing more than a lot of people ever have."

"I think Misato would object to that statement."

"She also thought you were a NERV spy when you first showed up, and look how right she was about that."

"Yes." Kyu giggles, a sound that sends Asuka's heart racing. "I suppose no one can be right all the time."

"We're only human," says Asuka. It sounds like something she'd hear Kyu say, wonderfully ambiguous. Kyu's hands tug on her arm, and a moment later, she feels something warm brush against her cheek: message received, and this is her reply.


End file.
